Maundy Thursday

Maundy Thursday is the Thursday before Easter and is considered to be the day that Jesus and His disciples shared their last Passover together. Most notably, during the Passover supper, Jesus displayed tremendous humility by washing His followers' feet. Then he told them to reciprocate for one another.

It is customary for Christians, particularly Roman Catholics, to visit seven churches on the evening of Maundy Thursday during the Lenten season. The Blessed Sacrament is placed on the church's Altar of Repose for Adoration after the Lord's Supper Mass. During the Seven Churches Visitation, the faithful stop by numerous churches—typically seven, incredibly infrequently 14, and occasionally no fixed number—to pray before the Blessed Sacrament. Aglipayan, Catholic, Methodist, Episcopal, and Salvationist Christians, among others, participated in the Seven Churches Visitation in an ecumenical setting.

The faithful remember Jesus's agony in the garden after the mass of the Lord's Supper, which commemorates his final dinner with his Apostles the night before his arrest. The Blessed Sacrament is placed in a tabernacle on the Altar of Repose, the main altar and the majority of the side altars are stripped after Mass, and all crosses are either removed or covered. Churches remain open late for silent adoration. This is in answer to Jesus' plea to his apostles in the Garden of Gethsemane, which is described in Gospel of Matthew 26:40, "Could you not, then, watch one hour with me?"

In order to pray in front of the Blessed Sacrament, those who engage in this visitation depart from the church where they attended the Mass of the Lord's Supper. This occurs more frequently in cities where churches are situated close to one another, making travel simpler. The Lord's Prayer, Hail Mary, and Gloria Patri are the prayers for this devotion in the Catholic Church, along with a prayer for the wishes of the current Pope. The Stations of the Cross are another option for prayer.

In Singapore, following the evening Mass of the Last Supper, church visits take place. At each church, the Lord's Prayer, Ave Maria, and the Gloria Patri are recited seven times each. With the selling of drinks, hot cross buns, and other regional snacks, there is a festive atmosphere. Observant Catholics eat a "Last Supper" meal in preparation for the fast the following day.

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Maundy Thursday, and even though the tradition is to visit 7 churches after attending the Mass of the Lord's Supper...I started a little earlier because I wanted to do my own little penance. 

Today was a little heartbreaking to be honest because I am made aware how much my granny and mum have aged and unable to make this journey with me. Not even if we took a bus or a taxi to each Church. 

I remember as a little girl, I would accompany granny and her friend to these 7 churches and when I got older, I would do this with my mum. This year is the first year I did it alone but at every Church, I sad an extra little prayer for them and remembered fondly of the times I did this with them in the past. 

So and my journey began. I first took a train from my office to Church #1.

Church #1 - Cathedral of the Good Shepherd

Walked from the train station and it was 650m which took me about 9 mins. 

Church #2 - Church of Saints Peter & Paul

Walked from Cathedral of the Good Shepherd and it was 180m which took me 2 mins.

Church #3 - St Joseph's Church

Walked from Church of Saints Peter & Paul and it was 180m which took me 2 mins.

Church #4 - Our Lady of Lourdes Church

Walked from St Joseph's Church and it was 650m which took me 9 mins. 

Church #5 - Church of Our Lady Queen of Peace

Walked from Our Lady of Lourdes Church and it was 5.1km which took me 1hr 5mins.

Church #6 - Church of the Holy Family

Walked from Church of Our Lady Queen of Peace and it was 2.0km which took me 26 mins.

Church #7 - Church of Our Lady of Perpetual Succour

Walked from Church of the Holy Family and it was 2.8km which took me 36 mins. 

...and walked another 2.8km to home from Church of Our Lady of Perpetual Succour. A total of 15.29km in 3hrs 49mins. 

Along the way, a few moments really stood out. Some funny and some heart warming. Let me share it with you...

The first funny moment was when I was walking to Church #5. About 3km into the journey, I tripped on the sidewalk and I kind of giggled to myself because the first thing that came to mind was "Debra falls the first time". Well, I suppose only the Catholics or Christians would get this. 

Anyway, as I was walking to the last church, I had to walk up a hill. I was exhausted by then but Daniel O'Donnell came on (my playlist) and started singing "Footsteps"... how truly appropriate. 

Then as I was walking home from the last church. I was absolutely exhausted and as I crossed the road, I met this elderly Malay lady who was probably in her 70's. It was 6.30pm and she was walking home with a basket of food, possibly rushing to get home to break her fast with her family. She hit something on the sidewalk and her basket toppled. Apples rolled away and her tray of eggs all crushed. A few walked by without stopping to help. As tired as I was, I stopped. I helped pick up the apples and something in me wanted to do more. So I took out whatever cash I had in my wallet as I don't carry much cash on me ever, and I had about $6 which was enough for a new tray of eggs. Her smile and her blessings towards me was all I needed to end the evening. 

And the rest of the walk home, my feet started to feel like lead and I was exhausted and dragging myself to get home. It was during that moment that I started reflecting on Jesus' walk to Calvary while carrying the heavy cross. Oh I forgot to mention that all this while, I had my haversack on me with my laptop in it as I started on this journey right after the office. But it was some good reflection and by the time I got home, I did lighten the mood and joked, "Jesus at least had Simon to help carry the cross at some point... I had no Simon to carry my haversack!" Haha.

So there I was, exhausted, but feeling so spiritually awakened. It was a beautiful Maundy Thursday. Next year, I plan to do it all over again. 

Mummy Dearest

It’s been exactly a month, to date, since my mum’s ICD surgery.

 

I knew from the start that this whole surgery thing was going to be very difficult on me, on so many levels and I thought I would be blooding every step of the way to keep myself sane but boy was I wrong.

 

I couldn’t even sit down long enough to find any energy in me to do anything else but to make sure mum was alright and am still doing that. Not to mention taking care of work and my family. I am literally mentally drained. At that point in time or for the last month, I could not even find the simplest words to describe how I felt.

 

Things are finally settling or maybe I am just getting used to juggling everything. Maybe I am just kidding myself because I am literally exhausted, mentally drained and have been fighting off depression that has been trying to set it on numerous occasions.

 

Nevertheless, the biggest relied now is that mum is recovering well and doing so much better. She is, however, going nuts though and in return driving me insane because she is stressing me out by being stubborn and I am afraid she is going to undo all the progress she has made so far.

 

So here I am, finally able to sit down and pen out my experiences stresses, thoughts and feelings about this whole scary experience; from the time this surgery was scheduled, to the night before and into it, until now.

 

Anyway, it’s been a little over a year since we found out mum’s heart is only working at 33% and she has a 60% blockage. We have since changed her diet and she has been on meds which did not make things better but it prevented her condition from getting worse. We have kept to her regular visits with her heart doc who from the start had suggested this procedure but mum was hesitant so mid last year she got an angiogram done. That did not solve the problem completely.

 

I suppose what made her finally knuckle under and agree to this procedure was because of me. No, I did not force it on her but explain why it was necessary and also because she knew since I found out about her condition, I have not had a full night’s sleep because I was afraid. I really was. What was I afraid of you might ask? I was afraid I would wake up one morning and mum wouldn’t. So a few times each night, I would get up just to make sure mummy was still breathing.

 

When she finally agreed to the surgery, I was relieved, but I also understood her fear. Thankfully, she had a great nurse for her consultation who assured her everything will be alright and how important this was.

 

Of course, once the surgery was scheduled, that created a whole new set of worries. I was mostly worried about the tiny slim chances that she won’t come out of it alive. It may sound like a stupid fear but I have known people to go in for something minor and not make it out alive.

 

So anyway, on the day of the procedure, I spent the time with mum at the hospital till it was time for them to bring her in to start the procedure. With a heavy heart, I hugged and kissed her and told her I will see her in a few hours. I remember that moment so clearly because although I was so very nervous, I had to pretend I was strong so she would not be scared. It was the hardest, walking away then.

 

They said the surgery would be around 1pm and it would take a couple hours. So I went home to see to things and waited for the hospital to call. By 4pm still no call and my nerves were about to explode. Finally at 5.30pm I said "F*ck it" and bought her dinner and went over to the hospital with Ed. I was going to break down some doors to find out where my mother was! But by the time I left, the hospital called and told me she was out. We headed to the ward and I was not expecting to see her in a high dependency ward. It took me a lot of courage to not break down and cry seeing her the way she was. But I had to stay strong for her. I know she is a warrior and would be ok.

 

The nurses there were wonderfully helpful and caring. Her doctor stopped by before heading home and explained what had happened. I guess mum was so out of it she did not even remember half of it.

 

Implant was placed in successfully but while they were doing that, mum was moving a lot so they had to sedate her which was probably the cause of why her pressure went down really low and oxygen level was at a low as well, thus why she had to be placed in the high dependency ward. Although the implant was successfully placed, her doctor told us it was a difficult procedure as their first try did not go so well so they had to find another spot on her heart to connect the device to. And because of that, there was a hole which caused some fluid to build up around the heart which could be the cause of the drop in pressure too. So they are monitoring that as well and if the fluid buildup worsens, they would have to drain that out.

 

I also remember she hadn't eaten all day and when she finally said she was hungry, the hospital kitchen was closed and since she was only allowed clear soups, Ed and I rushed down to the canteen to get her some.

 

Only thing I could think of was Yong Tau Fu. For my foreign friends, it’s a clear broth soup whereby you choose different items to put in it like veggies, toufu, fishcakes, etc. It's usually charged at a minimum amount of items of like 6 and it cost between $4 to $6. This stall was $5.70 for 7 items and the soup.

 

Since mum could not take solids and I was desperate to get her the broth, I told the lady behind the counter that I will pay her the FULL PRICE but I only want the broth. In her broken English, she shouted NO SOUP! I got pissed but I tried to explain that was all my mother could eat and the hospital kitchen was closed and she still wouldn't sell me the dame soup ONLY at FULL COST! F*ck that! I would pay $10 even because my mum needed it! But she still wouldn't listen! Compassion? She had none.

 

Pissed off, I picked out the 7 items..... (wanted to toss it in her face but controlled myself), slammed it on the counter instead and yelled at her to toss the items away and just pack the damn soup for me!

 

She did.

 

Well, wasn't that difficult was it?

 

With my temper and her attitude, it could have been a nightmare there at the canteen but my mama needed me and me being in lockup wouldn't do my mama too good.

 

So mum had some clear soup. I tied her hair up so it won't get in her face as her mobility is limited for now. Her pressure went back to normal by the time we left.

 

I was planning to stay the night with her but because it was a high dependency ward, they didn't allow me to. Walking away from her that same night was one of the toughest things I ever had to do.

 

By the third day, she was looking and feeling better and ready to go home but they kept her there for five days. It was the longest five days. I missed her being home with me. And running back and forth from home, work and hospital was no fun.

 

The last month has been tough. I had my hands full and many times I was at a breaking point but I picked myself back up and persevered through because mum needed me and so did everyone else. Between taking care of mum, Ed and the kids, I had to make sure my office work was done in a timely manner, and the house chores were done and lunch and dinner was cooked. Oh! Don’t forget the laundry!

 

It was for my family and I gladly did it all without complaints although I was very exhausted.

 

I always knew how much mum helps me with taking care of the house and such while I worked but it is during this time that I appreciate that so much more.

 

And all through this time, not once have my brother stopped to call and ask how she was doing. He did text, and I will give that to him but dammit. She is your mother not your friend! That really pisses me off and even more so because as much as my mum tells me she doesn’t care, I know it is killing her inside. Especially after all she has done and sacrificed for him. He boasts about owning three businesses to me to try and get me jealous? Please.... some big businessman you are when you cannot even support your own mother's medical expenses. Oh well.. such is life right? Karma is a bitch for sure. I won’t curse or wish ill on him but I will wish him all that he deserves. Don't worry bro. We won't need your money. Ed and I can and will take care of our mother. 

I just cannot wrap my head around a child not calling often to check on his/her parents to find out what is going on and then saying they never knew what the heck was going on. Huh? I will never forgive my brother after this. Not after I have seen and experienced for myself in the last month... that OUR mother almost died. I dare say I am almost traumatized by that because my world would shatter if I lost my mum. 

 

I am glad mum is getting stronger each day. She stresses me out when she gets stubborn and don’t take doctor’s orders and I have to keep an eye on her 24-7 but I understand how she feels and I know she must be going nuts not being able to do what she is used to. Hang in there mum…. You’ll be back to normal soon.

 

I would like to thank everyone who continues to check on mum and me.

 

Your kind words about what an amazing job I am doing caring for mum means so much to me and have given me so much more motivation to carry on. But I will say this… I do it because it is my duty and responsibility as a child. I do it because my mum deserves the best. I do it because it is my turn now to care for her after all she has done for me and sacrificed for me all through my life. I don’t need a pat on the back. I just need my mummy well and here with me for a very very long time.

Productivity: A is for Action Plan

 

I have experimented with a variety of positions over the last 25 years or so, including administrative manager, human resources manager, secretary, and executive personal assistant/confidential secretary to becoming a Director of my own business.

 

My major objective is always productivity, but efficiency is also quite high on my list.

 

Since the beginning, I have always used the phrases "productivity" and "efficiency" interchangeably without ever stopping to consider whether or not they are the same. The difference between the two terms has only become apparent to me over time.

 

Efficiency is the caliber of the work, whereas productivity is the quantity of it. These two concepts are synonymous in every way.

 

In summary, efficiency refers to doing the same amount of work in less time whereas productivity refers to completing more work in a given amount of time.

 

As was previously noted, productivity refers to meeting deadlines, but it is also crucial to learn how to do so without compromising the caliber of the job. You must therefore be accurate in addition to being swift.

 

So how can I improve my productivity and efficiency?

 

Distractions would often be eliminated for me. And every time I do that, without fail, I increase my productivity and efficiency. I usually will start by staying away from social media and turning off personal calls in order to do that.

 

I also think that by having a tidy, well-organized office space also increases my productivity. Not to mention maintaining orderly folders, saved files, and documents on your computer, making sure they are saved in the appropriate locations. This can aid in the thought process in addition to save you time from hunting for it. We can quickly lose our train of thought when forced to halt during our most productive moments to look for a document. Additionally, it can also be difficult to regain the appropriate frame of mind after looking for that document, which then reduces productivity.

 

So what about your least favourite tasks? Do you tend to save them till last? I was definitely at fault for that! But I have discovered that doing so merely serves to undermine the goal of gaining efficiency and since I came to that realization, I have started tackling my least favorite tasks first thing in the morning, instead.

 

In the past, I believed that starting with the simple duties would make the day go by more smoothly and allow me to accomplish a lot more before devoting a lot of time to the more difficult ones. The fact is that I was actually delaying the duties that required more effort since I knew I would run out of steam by the end of the day and then would have had to postpone them until the next day. It turns into a vicious cycle, and you might never finish anything after all.

 

But each person is unique in their own right. So finding out when you are most productive is crucial because some people are not as productive first thing in the morning. When you have finally done that, arranging your work according to difficulty throughout your productive hours will now help you work as efficiently as possible.

 

In addition, using a timer and a daily to-do list will also help you make sure you are not wasting time and that the right things are being completed at the most practical of times.

 

Spending less time on projects rather than more time has been one of my favorite productivity techniques in recent years.

 

You start by assigning a specific activity to a specific time of your day by setting a time limit on how long you spend on it. This not only saves you time, but it also lets you decide how much time you want to devote to your work.

 

Did you also know that one common time-management tactic is to use a productivity timer? I have learned that setting a timer and deciding on a clear end point for the activity is one of the finest strategies to limit the amount of time you spend on a task.

 

You are now motivated to focus your attention and energy on the subject at hand when you use a timer to limit the amount of time you can work on a certain task.

 

So set a time limit to complete the task the next time you work on it. Believe me how surprised you will be by how much you can do when you set a time restriction on your workday.

 

You can then break free from unending tasks by giving yourself a time restriction. The hard stops will keep you from putting things off and help your day go forward.

 

Set a timer. Get it done. And move on to your next task.

 

Moreover, despite the common misconception that breaks are a waste of time, the truth is breaks actually assist you to focus and enable you to work more effectively. It is usually more challenging to generate fresh ideas when your mind is focused on one subject for such a long period of time without a break. This is why I think we can all be more productive if we carefully plan 10 to 15 minute breaks throughout the day.

 

Don't even start me on multitasking right now.

 

I used to think I was good at multitasking and that I could accomplish a lot in a day. Even yet, I felt proud of it and of myself for completing all of those tasks. I believed it to be a "talent" that should be listed on my résumé.

 

Although multitasking might result in immediate successes, you need to know that focusing on numerous activities continuously over time can also cause exhaustion. Burnout makes it difficult for anyone to concentrate, which increases the likelihood of making mistakes when attempting to accomplish one's goals.

 

So take note that multitasking is not the best approach to increase productivity or even efficiency, as I have learned from experience.

 

While I was juggling so many tasks at once, I thought I was accomplishing a lot. Or So I thought. But I had to learn it the hard way that I was also lowering the caliber of my work.

 

Needless to say, I will not be multitasking anymore. I aim to produce high-caliber work and I actually save time and quality by avoiding multitasking and instead to complete one activity at a time instead.

 

I credit three main things for my professional development and rise in productivity over the course of my career in so many fast-paced industries.

 

1. Accountability

 

I always hold accountability for my goals.

 

That usually makes me want to work harder and be more careful always as it would make anyone. Why, one could ponder. It is straight forward. It is because it would increase your sense of ownership and mine.

 

2. Motivation

 

Motivation, in my opinion, is a key element in increasing not just work productivity, but also people's ability to work hard and be happy, even children.

 

Unmotivated people will not like doing any assignments handed to them, and that is a reality, whether we want to accept it or not.

 

I have had the good fortune to consistently have my work acknowledged and valued.

 

A simple compliment can go a long way.

 

3. Action Plan

 

Above everything else, having an action plan would still be the most important aspect in productivity.

 

An action plan is, however, what?

 

An action plan is a list of the things you must do and the actions you must take to accomplish the goals you have set for yourself.

 

You should include the following in the action plan, for example:

 

·         An explanation of your desired outcomes

·         Actions that had to be taken in order to reach those goals

·         Set a timeline

·         Set each assignment and goal's due date

 

And the best thing about having all of your goals in one place is that it makes tracking your progress and successfully planning things out so much simpler and much more convenient.

 

The actions required for you to accomplish your goals should be laid out in a comprehensive action plan. And do not forget to set a start date and an end date as well, which will help you to achieve your goals much more quickly.

 

However, why exactly do you need an action plan and how would it really benefit you?

 

An action plan will help you stay on track and it will keep you motivated and focused throughout. It will also provide you with a clear direction, increase your productivity, and prepare you for any challenges that you may encounter along the way.

 

When you plan and write down your goals, it will help you to stay motivated and dedicated. Additionally, by outlining the steps you must take to finish your action plan, you can also prioritize your objectives according to effort.

 

How do you really construct an action plan is now the million-dollar question.

 

How would one even start constructing an action plan? What characteristics define a good action plan?

 

Although writing an action plan may appear complicated, it is actually not that difficult if you follow a straightforward and simple framework. It may take some effort, but I can assure you that it will be worthwhile because it will keep you motivated and focused while you work towards attaining your goals.

 

Really, all it takes to build an action plan are four easy actions.

 

·         Set SMART goals

·         Create a list of actions

·         Set a timeline

·         Monitor the progress

 

1. Set SMART Goals

 

Always use the SMART outline prior to writing your action plan.

 

SPECIFIC – Always have well defined goals in mind.

 

MEASURABLE – Make sure your goals can be measured by including measurable indicators in all of your plans.

 

ATTAINABLE – You must be certain that your goals can be attained given the time, experience, etc., that you have.

 

RELEVANT – Your goals should always be in line with your requirements, interests, and capabilities.

 

TIMELY – Always give yourself a deadline for completing each of your goals.

 

2. Create a List of Actions

 

To achieve each goal, you must make a list of the tasks you must carry out.

You will need to break down your key goals into more manageable objectives during this process. This helps you go toward your goals in an organized manner and makes the ultimate objectives less intimidating and nerve-wracking.

 

Always keep in mind that the actions you set down should be doable and practical.

 

If a task seems too overwhelming, break it down into two or three smaller, more manageable action items.

 

To build a strategy that will get you to your ultimate goal, clearly outline each activity.

 

3. Set a Timeline

 

Along with giving each of your goals a deadline, you should also give each job in the process a completion date. Again, in order to sustain the steady progress you are making toward your goal, you must always establish a time frame you can realistically adhere to.

 

4. Monitor your Progress

 

Make sure to explain how you will make sure each of the tasks you've written down will be finished by the deadline. By doing this, you will be able to see how far along you are with each of your goals. Always be clear about the benchmarks you'll be using to gauge progress, such as the number of jobs finished.

 

Remember that an action plan is not something that must be followed rigidly. You will need to review your action plan as you develop and as your situation changes and make the necessary modifications to suit your new requirements.

 

These are my go-to strategies, and using them should enable you to master productivity and efficiency.

 

Complete your tasks. Be effective. Realize success.

Welcome 2023

 

It's been a trying year but I am grateful for the lessons learned. Through all the experiences, I've grown stronger.

I do owe it to dear family and friends who were there helping me get through the toughest year.

After so many years, I finally let go of all the negative people and things in my life; everything that was holding me back. And I've never felt better. I feel like a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulder.

Why did it take me this long to do this?

Well, no point wondering. No point looking back. I'm just going to look forward.

Aside from choosing to let people go... Without a choice, I've lost so many people dear to me. As much as I miss them and as sad as I am, it has taught me how precious life truly is, and that we should all treasure our loved ones who are still here with us. We should always remind them how much they mean to us and how much we love them.

This year has also taught me to be patient.

I've had a few close calls with a nervous breakdown but I fought through and came out of it stronger.

I've had to juggle work and had to make sure my family was okay.

Between my mum and the two kids, I've been trying to keep up with their doctors’ appointments in between work and my own personal goals.

But that is okay. I want to make sure my family is okay first.

On the bright side, I've managed to accomplish quite a bit this year and published my second book. It was a mad rush but I did it. I kept to my goal of publishing a book each year since 2021 and I hope to continue to do so.

So here we are on the last day of 2022 and I'm grateful for the good and the bad 2022 has thrown at me.

It surprised me how everything suddenly and miraculously worked in my favour when I decided to not allow negativity into my life. I realized how my then situation was only leading me to a blessing. Nothing was a mistake.

Life hits you differently when you stop trying to prove you didn't say that or you didn't do that. You can't fix every lie and rumour and neither can you defend yourself every time something is said about you. Just keep being you.

It took me a whole year to understand that sometimes a person doesn't even love you for real. They just know you're a good person and they would hate to see you loving another the way you loved them. Well? I take happiness over history and am letting that toxic shit go.

I'm proud of myself. I went through every type of pain, family issues, trust issues, heartbreak, insecurities and depression... I went through it all and never gave up.

I know I am on the right path because I feel good about moving forward and I cannot care less about looking back.

I will focus more on the people who inspire me rather than annoy me. This way, I know I will get much further in life.

Now it is time to do what is best for me. I am going to my wounds into wisdom.

I can't re-write my past but I can grab a clean sheet of paper and write my future and I sure am looking forward to 2023.

These past couple of years, there were places I thought I was destined to go, for which I was never meant. There were people I thought would ride with me forever, but at the first junction, upped and left.

There were hardships I thought would last a lifetime, but with time were swiftly swept away. There were plans I thought I had all set out, but those were not the cards of life I was dealt. There were times I thought things would end up differently, but I now understand that God always knows best.

I am now so confident about God's plan that I don't even get upset anymore when things don't go my way.

So this is me kissing the past goodbye. This is me leaving some of the baggage behind and learning how to forgive myself.

The burdens that I carried for too long, the fears that haunt me with every new exciting opportunity and the voices inside my head that cripple me from finding joy... this is me kissing them all goodbye.

I am still learning that the past don't always repeat itself, that I've grown and learned and evolved so I can trust myself to make better decisions.

And for you who are reading this; I hope you find the courage to change your life; in the small ways, in the big ways, in every way that matters. I hope you do not end this story with a heart full of regrets. I hope you do not spend 2023 just waiting for your life to begin.

I hope you realize that this is not the practice run, this is not the preview. This is it. There is nothing to do but leap. There is nothing to do but allow yourself to exist as boldly and honestly as you can.

You will think you have forever, but you do not. It all happens, and it happens quickly. You are not waiting on another person, or the right timing, or for everything to fall into place. You are waiting to feel ready enough to exist within the question, to not need every answer, and to know that this life does not come to us to be perfectly understood, but to be fully experienced, in every direction we can possibly reach.

Happy New Year!

#BriannaWiest #RaniaNaim #Fairy #KristenButler #CatherinePulsifer

Minimart Charity

 

It's been more than a month since I volunteered and contributed my time to charity. It has been a while since I've been looking to adopt a charity. I've been looking to give back to society and been looking for a charity.

My sister from another Mister has looking to do the same and she found this very cool charity which is a community minimart.

We have since adopted two neighbourhoods; Chai Chee and Toa Payoh and this community minimart gives low income residents groceries.

On our end, we donate the money and get friends to help contribute. Then the organizer will get the residents to give us a list of items they may need and we will then make out a grocery list with the items needed, quantity, etc.

On the day itself, about 20 volunteers will meet in the morning, and the grocery lists will be distributed. Each volunteer will gather the items on their list. We get about 45 minutes to do that and at the check-out, the organizer will make the payment and we will then proceed to the HDB block and set up our little minimart at the void deck.

At the void deck, we each set up our tables with the items we purchased for the residents.

While we are setting up, the residents will already be forming a line. The first time I saw this, I had so many mixed emotions. I was glad to be there to help, it warmed my heart to see the many smiling and excited faces of the residents, this experience made me realize how lucky my family and I truly are to have the life we have, and it made me sad to see there are still so many people in need.

It was an eye-opener for me. I had such a feeling of satisfaction being able to do this for the less fortunate.

Anyway, when the minimart finally opens, residents will go from table to table as if they are shopping. They can select up to 8- 9 items from canned goods to instant noodles, biscuits, veggies and eggs.

We managed to serve 80 low income residents, mostly in their 70s and 80s.

To see their smiling faces and to know how thankful they were for the rations they received made the time spent that morning all worthwhile.

A big thanks to the volunteers who spent their time helping with the distribution and a big thanks to the beautiful souls who made donations to make this possible.

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So what have I truly learned from this experience?

There are lots of people in this world who live a comfortable life and some even live a luxurious life and are able to get everything they desire. However, on the other hand, there are also tons of people who do not have enough food to eat or the basic necessities of life. The poor and needy are literally fighting each day to survive.

Poverty is in many countries, striking millions of people. Many poor and needy people struggle to attain the basic necessities of life for themselves and their families. They struggle to improve their way of living. And little did I realize, we still have so many in Singapore who are struggling.

We always think the country we live in is a rich nation and there are no poor people around but boy am I wrong. 

We may be comfortably living in our apartments or houses. We may not be getting affected by hunger but there are so many people out there who may not have eaten a proper meal in the last few days. It’s been more so, since the turmoil caused by the pandemic that is playing havoc in the lives of millions of people from all around the world.

Life is not kind to all of us. We won’t be able to help everyone in need, but our gesture, no matter how small, will definitely make a difference.

We are all in this together. We all can do our bit. Let's feed the hungry and help the less fortunate among us. Together we can make this world a better place. I know we can.

These poor people cannot improve their standard of life on their own and if we have the power to help them make their life somewhat more comfortable, why not? We cannot make their lives a lavish one but can at least help them to achieve the basic essentials of life.

Helping the poor and needy people is a good deed and a noble aim. And there are many ways that we can utilize or contribute towards the cause of further eliminate poverty around the world.

For one; we can use social media as it has become one of the most used, and also the easiest and quickest way to spread the word. By the use of social media, we can raise our voices and create awareness about issues and get a helping hand in any short periods of time.

Secondly, you can raise awareness. If you are aware of issues relating to the poor, you can use your information to raise the awareness to those around you. If you care about the poor and needy people, you can be sure that other people do too, but may just be unaware of how they can help. So share your information and start raising awareness.

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We must never look for a reason to help others.

Self-satisfaction makes life worth living. Each person may have a different need in his/her life. While some yearn for success, some don’t have the most basic amenities such as a shelter or enough food to eat. But that’s not all; some people may be in need of mere affection, those who are longing to see smiles.

We are lucky to be living a comfortable, happy life. How good would it be if we try to bring smiles to those sad faces?

Generosity is an easy doable exercise. Helping others is a blessing in disguise because when we help others to grow; we grow in the process too. It adds value and meaning to our lives.

Helping others is not always about giving them money or material things. Some people just need a shoulder to cry on or some good advice. And you don’t necessarily have to be friends with someone to be there for them. This is simply about being human and caring about other people’s well-being.

It really doesn’t matter who you are or how much you have to offer. Be kind just for the sake of it and expect nothing in return.

Helping others should come naturally and it should never be a question of 'why should I do it?'

A little help with a little smile gives meaning to human life. Happiness doesn't result from what we get, but what we give. And if we are lucky enough to be able to afford it, why shouldn't we try to help others?

As Mahatma Gandhi once said, "The best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others."

I sure am looking forward to the next round of our minimart charity that will be taking place the first week of January 2023. So if you would like to contribute to this course, whether it is $5 or $10 or even $1, please contact me for more details.

Things To Do When You Have A Headache

#Wellness

We all have experienced headaches at some point in our lives. Some of us get it more often than we would like. However, the good news is, we don't always have to depend on traditional or Western medicines to cure it.

There are some things you can do to ease the pain without a trip to the doctor or the drugstore.

1. Drink water

Dehydration is usually the number one cause of a headache. It's said that drinking water is shown to relieve a headache in most dehydrated individuals within 30 minutes to 2 hours.

2. Avoid foods high in Histamine

Foods/drinks such as beer, wine, smoked fish and cured meat are high in Histamine. It has been said that histamine may cause headaches.

3. Ease pressure on your head

A ponytail that is too tight of wearing swimming goggles that are too tight, or even wearing a hat may cause a headache. So try loosening whatever you have on your head to try and relieve the pressure from it. 

4. Dim the lights

Some people are prone to headaches caused by bright lights. Try dimming your phone/computer screens or lights in the room. You should also try and put on a pair of sunglass when you’re out in the sun.

5. Get enough sleep

Lack of sleep definitely triggers headaches. So be sure to sleep early and get at least 8 hours of sleep every day. 

6. Scalp massage

Try giving yourself a scalp massage. It is said that massaging the back of your head at the base of your skull can relieve a headache.

7. Stretch

Headaches are mostly caused by muscle tension, so by doing some neck stretches; it could help relieve some of that tension.

8. Hot shower

Taking a hot shower while letting the water fall on the back of your neck could help ease the tension in your head. 

9. Watermelon

Again, if you think your headache was brought on by dehydration, then eating water rich foods such like watermelon could help relieve your pain by rehydrating. 

10. Ginger tea

Ginger has anti-inflammatory properties that could alleviate some of the pain.

Happy Birthday In Heaven Godma

 Today would have been my Godma’s birthday. There are no words that would describe how much I miss her and having her around especially during parties as it has always been her “thing”. No words will ever describe how much I am still filled with regrets about what had happened and how we never made peace before she passed. But that is life. We all make mistakes and we learn from it. It is also something I will deal with for many years but I believe my Godma knows how much I truly do love her. 

Things are good with the family now … mostly.  A few till won’t talk to us because of the incident but it is not like we didn’t try. So be it. We have been spending a lot of time with Granny and taking care of her and making new memories. 

So today, the family, the few of us, got together at my granny’s to celebrate my godma’s birthday, to toast her memory. It was lovely. 

Even though we celebrated my godmother today and her memory, upon returning home, I could not stop thinking about how it could have been if we just got to say “sorry” and “goodbye” to her. But I suppose that there are incidents in life when you have no real control over things that happens around you. Sometimes, in these situations, family members face issues of their own and then life sometimes does not give us time to solve the issues in an orderly fashion. Then we get mad and angry when things don’t go the way we want it to then we lash out at each other. 

When that happens, we have to always remember to calm down and learn to feel strong enough to deal with all of what is happening instead of arguing and fighting with one another. 

It is normal for us to always think our problem is the hardest to cope with but others feel the same way about their problems too. 

I realize more now that everyone is an individual with different ideas and views. The would surely be boring if we all were programmed the same way. I sure do think it is important for families to have open communication and when there are disagreements, it is also important to consider the other party’s views and try to reach a compromise.

Families are individuals forced together through blood, they are not involved by choice but by birth. They have to deal with one another and their differences. Not just that, the family have to also deal with one another’s levels of growth and maturity as well as different goals, wants and needs. 

No matter how different each family member is, every human wants to have choices and freedom, but in order to keep a family together, sometimes we have to forfeit that luxury.  Families must always work together although it often takes arguing, and even maturity before we can see one another’s perspective.

We as individuals are all so diverse and complex, our personalities clash, our opinions differ, our beliefs and morals shape us into the person we are… the same goes with families.

There are 7 billion individuals on this planet, it is natural for us not to get along with others sometimes. Same with families… it’s normal for families to argue ad disagree! Healthy even. Generally, everyone is bound to meet in an argument with someone else at some point. Just never let it drag out too long for you to have regrets the rest of your life.